Of course, it’s true…

By comparing yourself with others there will always be those who

Appear happier

Are taller

Move faster

Look thinner

Are better looking

Seem younger

Have more time

Are more successful

You can feel the joy being sapped just reading this list!

But is it true? Is comparison really the thief of joy?

Last weekend, a couple of brilliant members of TEAM17 hosted a ‘How to Winter Well’ virtual retreat.

In one of the breakouts, I was joined by TEAM17 Member, Bolatito. We were talking about comparison and it being the thief of joy.

I assumed everyone would concur but she disagreed, arguing that it isn’t always the case and that you can use comparison in positive ways.

A lively (uplifting) discussion ensued and that made me think:


Here are three simple comparison flips:

1) Rather than be jealous, be inspired.

2) Only compare what you can change – park what you can’t.

3) Know that for everything you want in others, many people would love your life – exactly as it is now.

As we head into the festive season, it’s easy to make negative comparisons.

Don’t let them be the thief of Christmas joy.

Be Brilliant


PS Please leave your comments below



  1. December 9th 2021 by Carol Newman

    Just appreciate that some can do more than others at Christmas. This year it’s my turn to work on Christmas day and Boxing Day. I work in a care home laundry, we wear Christmas jumpers and try to make the days special for our residents. Its what you make it

  2. December 9th 2021 by jeremy Barnes

    Loved reading about comparisons, as I think it is a major issue in our society. I include myself in that and in particular my adult children and their contemporaries who spend so much time on social media making comparisons. Very wise words Michael. Thank you. Jeremy

  3. December 9th 2021 by Lana Turner

    I was delighted to read this as I’ve always felt that way about this statement. Comparing myself to others is what I do when I want to feel inspired. But I chose carefully.

  4. December 9th 2021 by Fiona Myles

    Great turnaround on the old comparison demon. I try and succeed often on the positivity but sometimes the odd little niggle creeps in when I’m tired or poorly that then rings my bell that says you need a break my dear .

  5. December 9th 2021 by Irene Campbell

    Thanks Michael. I needed that. Constantly comparing myself with others and suffering from low self esteem.

  6. December 9th 2021 by Theresa

    Interesting thoughts Michael. Comparing ourselves to others can be good in that we can feel inspired by others, taking on board new ideas & ways of doing things or simply feeling energised to follow our own path. It’s always worth bearing mind that we make judgements according to the ways we perceive things.

  7. December 9th 2021 by Grace O'Donnell Burke

    Totally agree flip the negative into a positive.
    Love yourself and appreciate what you have and keep aiming to be the best form of yourself 😊

  8. December 9th 2021 by Patrick Rooney

    I never compare myself to anyone. I treat everyone as an equal and im to guide my friends away from any negative thoughts about how they see themselves. We all have different talents of which we should be celebrating about not castigating ourselves .

  9. December 9th 2021 by Marilyn

    I have never been jealous of anyone, Only compare what you can change, if you can’t, park it. Love this. Just reminded me of something I can change instead of being fearful. Thanks for sharing Michael 😊

  10. December 9th 2021 by Alison D

    When faced with someone being unkind I consider what in their life makes them feel like this COMPARED to mine.

  11. December 9th 2021 by Chris mcconnell

    Interest – I have a few rules two of which on this subject is never compare yourself to others and never worry about what other people think. But many folk get their eyes opened and find goodness when sharing illness or benign in an environment of sick children for for example. You then compare by thinking it could be worse I could be really ill like these people or I wish I could be as strong as these terminally ill children. Instantly projecting you into appreciative of everything. Hope that made sense – all the best Michael and your gang x

  12. December 10th 2021 by Mary Masaba

    I can only be what I am and how possible I can stretch myself. To hell with all else. But ai get inspired by those who succeed and try to emulate wherever possible. I’m inspired that JK Rowling was rejected many times, I joined this course because Micheal is a successful write and I thought taking his course might hoist me onto the road to glory, provided I put in the effort.

  13. December 11th 2021 by Gillian Westlake

    The more people you interact with in this life the more you learn to be content with your lot . ( it still doesn’t stop me wishing I looked like Michelle Pfiefer though) 😂

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