I didn’t feel like going for a run this morning.
I could have waited until I did feel like it.
But that would have been a looooong wait. Instead, I put my trainers on and went.
I’d like to say, ten minutes in, I was enjoying it. But that would be BS. At that point I was going up that hill and cursing.
But 45 minutes in, when I stopped, I felt fab-u-lous.
We put a lot of faith in feelings.
I don’t feel motivated.
I don’t feel confident.
I don’t feel positive.
I don’t feel like having that conversation.
Fair enough. Your feelings, your life.
But who said you must feel like something before you do it?
Maybe we have the order wrong?
We think motivation gets us started, when getting started creates motivation.
We think confidence creates the action, when action creates the confidence.
I bet you’ve done something despite feeling nervous and had the confidence arrive afterwards.
Instead of: How do I make myself more confident?
Test:
What would the behaviour of a confident person be?
They might look up. Smile. Slightly strut. Introduce themselves first. Speak up.
You can do all those things without feeling confident.
And how about these?
What would the behaviour of a brilliant leader be?
Listen. Ask the extra question. Make the decision. Have the difficult conversation.
You can do those without being Nelson Mandela.
What would a kind person do?
Send the message. Offer to help. Give someone the benefit of the doubt.
You don’t even have to feel especially kind.
And what would a motivated person do?
Probably start.
I think I could sum up this message like this:
Don’t wait for the feeling. Start with the behaviour.
You don’t have to feel like going for the walk. Take the first 20 steps.
You don’t have to feel confident. Do the next confident thing.
You don’t have to feel motivated. Start for five minutes (17 minutes even better).
You don’t have to feel positive. Ask a better question.
Feelings are funny things.
Sometimes they lead, but often they follow.
The next time you catch yourself saying, ‘I don’t feel like it.’
That’s OK.
Do it anyway.
Your feelings can catch up later.
Be Brilliant!
Michael
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