No one wants to lose, but if you are going to, it’s worth losing well.

Christine and I were lucky to be part of the legendary Toon Army who made the trip to London for the Carabao Cup Final last weekend.

Commentators said we didn’t win the game but we won Wembley.

But lose we did (or as I like to think about it – came second)

After an initial ‘woe is me’ most fans were pragmatic.

In fact, many continued the party after the game.

You can take the Geordie out of Newcastle (party capital of Europe), but can’t take Newcastle out of the Geordies.


We lost well.


We all lose at some point.

I’m sure you have an opinion on non-competitive school sports days.

Let me know in the comments.


For some, winning is everything.

I have a friend who joined a yoga class and claimed, after just two sessions, they’d ‘won’ that week!


Being gracious in defeat is a tough life skill. But an important one.

So here goes.

Congratulations Manchester United on a well deserved Carabao Cup win.

We still have the best fans though!

What are your thoughts on losing?

Be Brilliant!



  1. March 2nd 2023 by Debbie Homer-Davis

    My Daughter failed her Kent Grammar Test ( by 3 marks ) She went on to win 3 Scholarships to independent schools . We also wrote her the most amazing speech about failure quoting people like Michael Jordan ( who was dropped from his high school team ) Walt Disney ( who was told by his newspaper editor he had no imagination and no ideas ) and many others that turned failure into success. She won a trophy for that speech and she got to recite it ( aged 10 ) to 600 parents on Speech day. So from loosing she actually had huge success. none of which might have happened without the initial failure.

  2. March 2nd 2023 by Neil Evans

    Another way of looking at the Cup Final result is to state that while Newcastle came second, Man Utd came last but one.

  3. March 2nd 2023 by Lesley Renault

    I think learning how to deal with failure is important. Sports days are an easy way to start learning. If you don’t then when you an adult you won’t be able to cope with failure and it could impact your life in ways you later regret.

  4. March 2nd 2023 by Edward Swindale

    Love the quote, “If a thing is worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.” It encourages me to start even when I am not sure how it will turn out. I can learn from failure if I have the guts to keep going. Enjoy the journey. You might even provoke others.

  5. March 2nd 2023 by Alison Messom

    While our hockey team always play to win, we often don’t. We always give our all have fun and lose well. We always celebrate our successes, nominate our player of the match and are often mistaken for the winning team back at the clubhouse. The days we win are obviously epic celebrations.

  6. March 2nd 2023 by Clare Fryer

    Learning how to compete and enjoy the participating rather than winning or losing is very important. Its great to win, but children need to learn that there is no shame in not winning every time.
    Celebrating wins is good, but celebrating the things that went well even if a team didn’t win is also good.
    Learning from mistakes and the times we don’t win is such an important life long skill for kids to learn. Its not the losing that is important but what you learn and how you apply it that matters.

  7. March 2nd 2023 by Persephone ‘Debbie’ Lynn

    I am very used to losing well being a West Ham fan! It’s a weekly occurrence at the moment. But on another note- I am fiercely competitive to the point of striking fear into people on work ‘team’ days when there is a ‘tabletop’ quiz/ comp. As Matron for a children’s hospice so considered a ‘big boss’ I had to learn very fast to control and tone that element of my character down, which has been useful at times if I’m having to congratulate other football fans (through gritted teeth still)….. but the one thing the idea of winning/ losing is useful for is developing my tribes….. because I don’t ever give up. My tribes for the book and little business outside of my nursey life would very easily be abandoned with the hours I work but by channelling that competitive nature and not wanting to ‘lose’ well is beneficial. But on the odd day I feel like I’m ‘losing’ I’ve realised it’s OK- I can be kind to myself and then try again tomorrow

  8. March 4th 2023 by Matthew Chandaengerwa

    I have a friend who is so fiercely competitive he not only sulks when he loses a tennis match but furiously disputes line calls if they go against him.
    I have just sent him your post Mike in the hope it miggt change his behaviour.
    Losing graciously is such a glorious gift!

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